How many times have you heard someone say ‘speed kills’? It’s obviously a very odd thing to say, since we all know that it’s... Slow drivers; you’re the problem

How many times have you heard someone say ‘speed kills’? It’s obviously a very odd thing to say, since we all know that it’s not the speed that kills; it’s the stopping really, really quickly that does the damage. No, when someone tells you that ‘speed kills’, they’re talking out of their bottom. And the people that say it tend to be really slow drivers. The same really slow drivers that are completely oblivious to the nuisance they cause to other road users. They think that it’s much safer to drive 10mph under the speed limit than 10mph over it… but it’s not. And this is exactly why I think slow drivers are the problem.

First things first, how annoying is it when you are sat behind someone doing 30mph on a 50mph road? If you’re on a bike, it’s only a very mild irritation, as you’ll have nipped passed them before it’s had chance to boil your piss. It’s when these inconsiderate clowns hold car and van drivers up that it’s a major issue. A car can’t just nip past, the way a bike would, and a van certainly can’t. They’ve got to wait for a bit of straight road so they can see if there’s a gap in oncoming traffic, get a bit of a run-up and hope for the best. There might not be a bit of straight road or a gap in oncoming traffic for ten miles. By now, the poor bastard’s late for work. Or his dinner’s cold. All because one arsehole doesn’t know how to drive properly.

With patience wearing thin, the otherwise sensible driver becomes increasingly likely to attempt a risky overtaking manoeuvre, just so he can get some miles under his belt. And whilst any accident that occurred as a result of this would, by law, be the fault of the ‘overtaker’, it’s quite clear that the ‘overtake-ee’ (that was driving too slowly) ought to be the one held accountable. He won’t be though. He’ll get off scot free.

And if slowing cars and vans down is bad enough, holding a lorry up in a vehicle capable of doing 100mph should be considered one of the worst crimes ever. Punishable by a good hard kick in the nuts (or the fanny). There’s absolutely no excuse for it. If you’re sat on the motorway in your 40ft articulated lorry doing 56mph you shouldn’t ever need to overtake anything. You and your trucker mates should be the slowest things on the road. Every now and then though, you’ll find you need to overtake some joker in a car doing 50mph. I know because I’ve seen it. It should never, ever happen, and if you have to ask why, you shouldn’t be on the road.

If I was in charge, the lorries would have to stay in the slow lane where they belong, but if there was a car holding them up for no good reason, they’d be allowed to ram them off the road. And it would serve them right.

Because having a great big lorry going that slow is one thing; there’s a good reason they are going so slowly, you can see them a mile off and you expect them to be doing that speed. You’ve no reason to expect a car to be going that slowly so when they are it can cause all sorts of problems.

Whether it’s a motorway, dual carriageway or a B-road, if Mr Magoo is doing 20mph less than everyone else, it’s going to cause a problem. Whilst he’s sat there, oblivious to his surroundings and listening to Shania Twain on the wireless, everyone else is having to slam the brakes on, swerve out of the way and take last-second avoiding action in an effort not to smash into him. They may well end up smashing into someone or something else, whilst Captain Knobwash trundles along on his merry way. Probably blissfully unaware.

Because it’s extremely doubtful that he (or she) is concentrating fully on driving. You don’t need to concentrate when you’re driving that slowly, do you? You do if you are driving faster. In fact you definitely do, if you’re speeding (and not just concentrating on looking out for speed cameras). The faster you go, the more you have to concentrate, and the more you concentrate, the safer a driver you’ll be. That’s just common logic.

I’m not saying everyone should break the speed limit. But what I am saying is that just because you might drive a little bit over the speed limit from time to time, it doesn’t make you a dangerous driver. Constantly driving significantly under the speed limit though, does. It’s also very, very bad manners. No, if you’re not prepared to drive at least 40 in a 40, 50 in a 50, 60 in a 60 etc. then you ought to ask yourself whether you should be driving in the first place. It would be better for everybody if all you slow drivers stayed at home. Or got the bus.

Boothy

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Flash Gordon
Flash Gordon
3 months ago

I have often felt the need for rocket launchers on the front of the van to clear slow moving obstacles.

Haydn Williams
Haydn Williams
3 months ago

bob on Boothy!!. 95% aint got a clue, Clarkson said they should be shot! ha! ha! Maybe a tad harsh, very few understand the science of riding or driving, shall we say, whilst making good progress officer

Rowland
Rowland
3 months ago

I think the danger of the the dawdling in an NSL driver is they’re probably programmed to do 40-45 everywhere and just don’t process speed or road hazards. Keep well away. I have absolutely no respect for anyone who can;t back off through a town or village, particularly past a school, where there are childen playing near the road or through a busy highstreet full of dumbfucks that just wander into the road. I’d rather have my jollies where I’m only likely to endanger myself and the hedgerows or ditches.

Alex Horky
Alex Horky
3 months ago

I quite agree and yes, it boils my piss!

Luke Deadman
Luke Deadman
3 months ago

You know what’s worse then this? People not knowing how to join a road from a slip road! I’ve seen people blind side others, cause people to swerve and worst of all STOP on the slip road because they can’t get their thick skulls around the fact a slip road is for getting up to the speed limit of said road before joining so you seamlessly join traffic already on it!

SmallFish85
SmallFish85
3 months ago

Wow Boothy, seems you stuck your plonker in a bee’s nest with this one. It strikes me there’s a hefty number of people in this world that still haven’t got the hang of spotting satire yet. Bless their little cotton socks.

I would like to propose a contrary view on one particular point: truckers. I have proposed for years that lorry drivers should be provided with an over take button that provides them with sufficient power to pass another truck at 60mph. The catch? Every time they press it they lose a digit. Yes, you read that right. That’d make em think more carefully on a dual carriageway.

I would however be fully behind a roads based extermination squad. Kind of like a waffen SS with high vis jackets. Forget to use your indicator? Into the ditch you go. Tailgate and flash your headlights to someone already doing ten over the limit? There’s a bullet with your name on etc.

Andreas
Andreas
3 months ago

I was thinking exactly this today. Slow right lane drivers make u move into left (not uk) and then drivers need or want to go faster going into slalom or just pushing left lane drivers, and can’t blame them. This wouldn’t happen if right lane could follow the speed limit. Going 50 even 60 on 70 lane is not safe for anyone.
I won’t talk about lower than limit on left lane, that’s another story.

Wayne
Wayne
3 months ago

As usual, precise cut-out-the-dogshit sense. I’ve had a few close calls due to myopic dangle berries joining a busy motorway at 45 mph, causing lorries to barge into lane 2 or end up wearing the offending micra as a bonnet ornament. The bit about stressing the poor white van man behind by not approaching cruising speed is bang on. The issue is that when mr plasterer sees a gap that the believes he can get past mr/mrs meek in front, he has 0.3 seconds to decide whether to floor it or miss his chance.. so he takes his chance, and squashes mr biker who’s making his way to the front ‘cos he didn’t have the thinking time to look in his mirrors.

George
George
3 months ago

You can fail your driving test for being too slow. If you are not within 10% of the speed limit you get a minor, repeat the same minor 3 times you fail. So for a car on a motorway this would mean any slower than 63 mph would mean a minor on your driving test. If it’s classed as poor driving on the driving test why once you’ve passed can it not be enforced as such. If highways agency is so obsessed with average speed and managed motorways give these idiots points for piss poor driving.

Rowland
Rowland
3 months ago
Reply to  George

That 10% is a bit vague given speedometers can over-read by 10%+6.25mph… that said my bandit makes full use of this optimism and riding through a 40 camera with 50 on the clocks is a requirment to avoid being sat on the bonnet of an audi. Yet my first car, a mighty 55bhp polo was absolutely dead on and won me an awareness course for 42 in a 40 before i realised. Satnav for calibration.

That said when I finally took my cage test, examiner saw a pink license and thought i’d doen something awful and was sat there alternately fuming and full of distdain and it wasn’t untill I passed that saw the class A on the obverse and I realised he was annoyed becasue he couldn’t mark anything down, and described my driving as “annoyingly brisk” and i was dawdling.

Definitions of making appropriate progress are proper vague. Did IAM in the car and the examiner was proper oldschool and encouraing me to really push in NSLs right upto the point where faster would have been loose, ugly and beyond what I’m prepared to do on a public road in a heavy mondeo for jollies.

Joe
Joe
3 months ago

Well said! The one that constantly irritates me is the goons doing 40mph and braking sharply for every corner and oncoming vehicle on your favourite bit of National speed limit B-road tarmac, only then to actually maintain or increase that speed when they get into a 30mph zone, obliviously sailing through residential areas at speeds that would easily get a hefty penalty. It’s possible to fail a driving test for going too slow, why don’t we see fines for it?

Richard Chapple
Richard Chapple
3 months ago

100% disagree. If you are going to overtake a vehicle, then crash, it is your fault. No one else’s. Your own actions are your responsibility, simple as that.

People drive slowly for many different reasons. Maybe they have a disability, maybe they dont know the area, maybe they are nearly out of fuel. Its not illegal to go 49 in a 50; A 50mph limit is a limit, not a speed that you have to be at or else.

Is there any actual thought to these posts or is it just anger that goes into them?

Daryl Maher
Daryl Maher
3 months ago

ohhh fuck off richard you kill joy 44teeth aint for you mate

Richard Chapple
Richard Chapple
3 months ago
Reply to  Daryl Maher

Thank you for your reply, but I have been following 44Teeth since its conception.
I was adding an element of common sense and logic. Do you seriously agree with everything in this blog post? You really think that if you crash while over taking someone, it should be them that gets the blame and not you? My point was that you should take take responsibility for your own actions. If it means you are stuck behind a car for a few miles before you can safely overtake, then so be it. If you don’t agree with that, then you’ll be thankful that hospitals exist.
I’m not a kill joy, I’ve just learnt from past mistakes. I wouldn’t wish a crash on anyone, its horrific.

Wayne
Wayne
3 months ago

I understand what you’re saying here, and in a perfect world without timescales and emergencies, you’d be more right than you are. I can only presume you’ve not had to struggle to the office for a meeting while some old coot is trying to find his worthers original.

Vehicles these days are many times safer than they were in the 60’s but the drivers still assume their corsa will take the same stopping distance as the queen mary to come to a halt. Education is up there, but so is common sense – the world needs to move at a pace, or you might as well go get ol’ trigger out of the barn and saddle it up. If you’re not capable of keeping up with traffic – then get out of it.

Richard Chapple
Richard Chapple
3 months ago
Reply to  Wayne

I appreciate your understanding. I am 24 years old and have had my fair share of being late to meetings, interviews, weddings and even a funeral, simply because someone, for whatever reason, is driving well below the speed limit.

You mentioned common sense. Common sense IS my point. This article asks for no common sense to be used and instead, demands that anything that happens when a driver or biker is forced to overtake a slow vehicle is the fault of the driver of that slow vehicle.

I am not arguing to say that it is okay to go 35mph in a 50 limit, I am arguing to say that we shouldn’t just blindly agree with an article that states such ridiculous things.

As a fact, if you decide to overtake a vehicle moving at any speed, the outcome of that overtake is on you and no one else. We should all be able to agree on that.
For example, if you can’t see past a corner, it would be wise to wait until you can to see if it is SAFE to overtake. Right? My main point here is the most basic. You are in control of your vehicle, you are in control of your actions and if you cant accept that, then you should not be driving or riding.
If you have had a crash in any vehicle, you’ll understand. Until then, you can’t possibly understand the true consequences. I had to learn the hard way and I have come to accept it.

As for the rest of the article, fine, it is dangerous not to be doing the same speed as everyone else on a motorway or duel carriageway. Again, that is pretty basic.

I may come across as a kill joy or a complete and utter twat, but you know I am speaking the truth.

John
John
3 months ago

I think there are other websites that would suit you better

Chris burf
Chris burf
3 months ago

I love the way you have massaged the argument to suit your own agenda, we’re not talking about people doing 49 in a 50, the issue is, people driving well below the speed limit indicated for that road, 35mph in a 50mph limit is simply not acceptable and if you lack the confidence to drive at the appropriate speed you shouldn’t be on the road, joining a motorway at less than the speed of the traffic already on it is downright dangerous and should be careless driving!!
Not to mention the people who think a slip road is for merging when in actual fact it’s a give way, if the lane isn’t clear don’t fuc&!ng join it.

Lucy
Lucy
26 days ago

Really, you use the argument of 49 in a 50. The article isn’t about that. Or did you just write that to piss everybody off?

Ok, I just read down and seen that you are 24. Get a few years more driving experience under your belt mate and then reply.

Simon
Simon
3 months ago

His article is very badly writen. But not once did he ment residential areas. He used motorways as the main example.
But the bottom line is slow drivers are the route cause. Not driving at the speed limit causes someone to overtake. To eliminate the problem you need to find a way to make slow drivers drive at the speed limit.
If its a confidence issue they need to go on courses because if you aren’t confident driving you shouldn’t be doing it. Same goes for using a rifle in the army or being a surgeon.
If its not knowing what the speed limit is then they need to be educated. Educated that the national is now 60mph for a car not 50. Many old people still think it’s 50.
If it’s because they “feel it’s their right” they need to have a look at themselves. Dordaling around in the way of other people is inconsiderate and selfish. Stopping in a shop door way is to.
The highway code says every road user has a duty to maintain the flow of traffic. Slow drivers break this rule. There needs to be a law for it like there is for other aspects of the highway code.

Last edited 3 months ago by Simon
John
John
3 months ago
Reply to  Simon

If you’re going to say someone’s article is badly written, you’d better sort your spelling out;
Ment = mention
Writen = written
Route = root
Dordaling = dawdling
(P.S. whilst it isn’t technically wrong, starting sentences with conjunctions the way you do is plain sloppy)

Tony s
Tony s
3 months ago

Couldn’t agree more. Said the same for years. People won’t hear it though !

Nye Davis
Nye Davis
3 months ago

Boothy the bellend at it again with his radical, blinkered and unfounded politics. Speeding is dangerous, speeding kills. Driving slowly without paying attention is illegal, everyone knows what ‘driving without due care and attention is’, to universally equate slow (safe) to inattentive is as moronic. Fortunately, it just so happens that most of the population have grasped the concept that the road isn’t a race track and they’d rather not be run over trying to cross the road with the kids / dogs because Boothy thinks their residential street is the back straight at Donnington

Steve
Steve
3 months ago

Being a lorry driver myself I’m with you regarding slow drivers on the motorway/ dual carriageway. Regarding the speed limits any police officers answer to it would be it’s a limit not a target so good luck convincing them.

Adam McFarland
Adam McFarland
3 months ago

Here here! I’ve been saying this same thing for years.

Ian
Ian
3 months ago

You’ll get some slack for this rant….but yeah, you’re 100% right 🤣

Josh
Josh
3 months ago

YES THANK YOU! Someone else shares this view. It’s gotten worse over lockdown for sure.